Flickr Photo by Joshua Twentythree
Flickr Photo by Joshua Twentythree


Admit it: your relationship has fizzled.

You love your partner but those days of spontaneity are long gone.  Fun is just a three-letter word.  You guys are more besties than lovers.  Goodness, you can’t even bring yourself to say the word lovers!

Honestly, you should both be ashamed of yourselves.  You’ve stopped trying.  When natural spontaneity in your relationship inevitably diminishes, that’s when you both need to get active to add fuel to the fire.

You need serious help.  We all do.  No one prepared us for this and we sure as hell don’t want to turn into our parents!

So forget dinner and a movie.  The next time you’re looking to reconnect with your partner, gives these a try:


#1: Make a Fort

If you’ve got young kids and date night has to be at home, this is a great alternative to Netflix and chill.  Grab your stash of mismatched bed sheets, pillows and blankets and build a fort in your living room.  Click here if you need help with construction and décor ideas.  Dust off your mad libs books or board games for some laughs.  Or if you want to keep it romantic, read each other your favorite poems or stories.


#2: Picnic in the Park

Photo by Priya Marie
Photo by Priya Marie


Sometimes getting a babysitter for the evening can be difficult, especially on a weekend.  But if it’s easier to have someone watch the kids during the day, pack a basket with your favorite eats, bring a blanket and head to your local park.  Central Park and Prospect Park may immediately come to mind, and they are great spots.  However, if you’d like some privacy, consider taking a short drive out to Branch Brook Park in Newark.  It was designed by the Olmsted Brothers, sons of Frederick Omsted, the landscape architect behind Central Park and Prospect Park.  Branch Brook Park is just as gorgeous with 90% less people.

Warning: no alcoholic beverages allowed!


#3: Midweek Hotel Stay

What a great way to switch things up a bit!  NYC has a plethora of fun hotels to stay at, from The Gansevoort to the Waldorf-Astoria to the Broome Hotel.  Many have deals that you can find on Groupon or Living Social.  A change of scenery can do wonders, so can giving your partner the night off from cooking!  Add amenities like a pool or spa and it will be hard for your long-lost spontaneity not to drop by.


#4: Weekend Getaway

I came across this great idea here.  If you have the means and the time, consider packing a carry-on, head to the airport and buy two of the cheapest, soonest departing round-trip tickets that your airline of choice has to offer for the weekend.

Not a good option for those of you who struggle with winging it.  I can see how this much room for chance might turn a fun weekend getaway into a nightmare for you.  But for those of you who thrive on adventure, this could be awesome!


#5: Nightly Check-Ins

I consider this a must-have in every couple’s relationship toolbox.  What an easy way to conduct relationship maintenance.  I came across this on The Dating Divas website.  You can download the free printable here.  It’s a series of questions you ask each other to get a better understanding of what your partner’s day was like, what your hopes are for the future, and what your partner might have on her mind so that you can be mindful of it and maybe even offer assistance.

I’ve tried a few of these and they’re great.  What they taught me is how you can still connect with your partner even if you’re upset.  It doesn’t mean that you stop feeling hurt or angry and it doesn’t mean that you’re avoiding the issue.  But it does mean that you’re still nurturing the relationship you have with each other despite the pain.

By doing so, you can’t help but become aware of how much reconnecting with your partner is really a choice that we all make.

For more quick and easy relationship maintenance ideas to reconnect to your partner, stay tuned for future posts!

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